The sky has officially fallen

and people have lost their minds.

I have lived in Michigan my entire life and it snows every year...every ding-dong year. Oh, some years more than others and sometimes in amounts that make you think you have somehow been transported to Antarctica...but it snows. Lets all just take a deep breath and think people!

Don't panic and run to wal-mart and buy up all the bottled water, even if you don't have a degree in biochemistry I bet you can figure out what snow is made from.

Don't think because you have 4 wheel drive you are somehow above the laws of physics.

Don't assume the people at the weather channel are your best source for information...they stand in the middle of hurricanes for a living. Also, sitting up watching the cold front move in does nothing to help the situation.

Dogs do not share your feeling of impending doom...

Never hire a snow plow guy who thinks if he plows the roads before the snow hits it counts...also, never hire the guy who plowed in my car, thanks again dude.

Keeping the Queen in line

After spending far too long in Michael's (meaning any time in Michael's) I had to have a long heart felt time out concerning what exactly is Queen G and what am I trying to do. Because of the economy or just a deep seated need to 'create' there are so many people out there selling 'hand made' items that the market is effectively flooded. Even my favorite, incredibly scary, dirty and always entertaining flea market/livestock auction has a guy sitting in one of the cow sheds stringing beads.

Got a new outfit, need some matching (urg) jewelry...just download a 40% off coupon and head to the nearest store...some one there will hook you up. Never done it before, its simple, child's play, anyone can do it! Why, its almost therapy. Make 2 and call yourself a Crafter, make 10 and congratulation, you are an Artisan.

The necklace in the picture is a classic example of what I am trying to do, taking broken pieces and repurposing them. In this case, a broken rosary, a barrette, some vintage chains, antique buttons, some recycled beads and a rose quartz. Its a one of a kind, hand assembled...(there is quite a discussion over what constitutes handmade) and very quirky.

But the competition out there is fierce, cut throat and down right nasty. Photos are being stolen from shops, ideas flat out copied, concepts and techniques are being lifted as soon as they hit the Internet.

For me, that isn't a big concern...go ahead and copy, good luck and god bless...but some of my friends, especially the quilters, designers, cooks and digital artist are really struggling. And how would you protect your Grandma's uber special dark chocolate mocha fudge recipe if someone has something similar...well, you can't. So we do what we can, support our own and hope for the best.

Last year was my first full year doing this as a full time...hobby??? therapy??? keeping Ginya off the streets??? After counting the costs, mileage, supplies; not including my time; I think I should just go hand out carts at Wal-mart.

But for the most part, I would do this anyway...and so would most of my fellow strugglers. So please, if you get a chance to buy handmade even if it costs a bit more, involves having to open a pay-pal account, can't be picked up on the way to the...(insert function here), involves communication between you and the crafter, and means you have to put some thought behind your purchase, at least give it a chance. Who knows, you might just be the person who gives confidence to the next great jewelry designer!

somewhere, out there...

This is some place in China that I went to for a rather interesting dinner. Well, every dinner in China was interesting, some more than others. This dinner consisted of the obligatory drinking game (that I normally avoided) some very good food and an entire evening not talking about work. It was cold and desolate and hauntingly beautiful.

Working over there was awesome. I saw some things I can never forget. I saw some things I wish I could forget. I ate a lot of food that seem unbelievable now and enjoyed myself as much as possible. I worked harder than I ever did for longer hours and under dubious conditions, and I would go back tomorrow if asked.

Working in another country makes you really appreciate what you got. It makes you long for the times when you can tell a joke, speak a little faster, stop repeating yourself and find the light switches.

You learn to appreciate CNN, MSNBC and the BBC. You also learn to bring your own toilet paper, make a meal out of instant oatmeal, cherish your aspirins, and always wear comfortable shoes.

You learn the true meaning of humidity.

You find out who your real friends are...I was there once over Easter and my girl Trena sent me some chocolate eggs!

I found out I can pee standing up! (I also found I have no natural balance!)

When you work overseas you find out there are class differences everywhere but nowhere as pronounced as on a US air plane. And if you think that I am kidding, try sneaking into the first class section and going to the restroom. Them little flight attendants can kick like a mule.

I miss traveling there, I miss working with people who really want to provide you with quality product. I miss the interactions with people and the inevitable culture collision that occur on a daily basis. I miss the tea poured from across the room into glasses filled with what looks like grass trimmings and cocoons, the sticky rice and even the ubiquitous pigs ears.

But mostly I miss the people.

Traveling for work may not be everyones cup of tea, but for me it was heaven. ANd a silent shout-out to all my friends overseas, enjoy a moon cake for me!

The Queen today

For those of us with 'big girl' glasses the words are: I am the Queen of England, I like to sing and dance, and if you don't believe me, I'll bite you in the pants. Such sentiment, such pathos, such charm and beauty!!! It was my very first computer generated design waaaaay back...I haven't improved.

I just am not computer savvy. Some people get it, some don't. At my advanced years and declining interest I am starting to realize a lot of things just don't interest me so I'm not investing any of my remaining brain cells to worry about them.

I don't text well or often...don't text me cuz I just found out I have to pay for them...emergency's I will consider, but making sure I am on your list of 10 beautiful women, bff's or gods special chosen ones, just so you think you got a chance at the lottery is gonna put you on my list. And we all know what list that is!

The Queen does not:
tan
do any thing with the word 'extreme' in the title
eat food from dumpsters or haute cuisine joints
enjoy rap (there I said it!)
understand anything on G4
play video games more complicated than bejeweled
think Dane Cook is funny

The Queen will always bitch and moan over any changes in any way up to and including tv schedules, format changes, product design and hours of operation. (omg, my local Post office closed at 4 and I dang near imploded).

Yup, I am my mother after all...now YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!!!!!!!!!!!1

my big-gas truck

After much searching and hair pulling we finally got our big-gas truck.

The next day gas prices increased to over $3 a gallon...sorry 'bout that

We got it because we live down a dirt road that is somehow uphill both ways. And as it is a private community the county does not plow the roads, or grade the roads or have anything to do with our roads whatsoever. We are on our own. So after being stuck far too many times spinning round in circles on a frozen driveway we bought our truck, Jerry-Jeff.

So now I am gradually learning how to drive the beast and trying not to watch the gas gage spin quickly towards the E. And so far I have learned a few things:

Being higher means better visibility for me but however does not translate to you. I am still invisible and can not find the switch to turn off the 'cloaking device'.

I am way to short to clean off the windows

Drive thru banking is now 'watch Ginya climb out the window and hang off the side to grab the canister'.

Shrubs of any size or age are now at my mercy.

Running boards just add another step to complicate my life and usually involve a drunken slip with my coffee in one hand, purse, mail and groceries in the other.

Mud flaps are a must.

I'm driving 55 till gas prices get better, you can go around me, tailgate me, flip me off, or kiss my lily white be-hind...my heart can't take another fill up.

Parking is at best an adventure at worse an accident waiting to happen. I suck at parking this beast, but I'll get better, I promise.

So if you are in my neck of the woods and see a big old truck being driven at a respectable speed with a little old lady sipping her coffee, drive around and wave...and look out when them prices come down cuz momma's got 4 wheel drive!

Evening in Paris

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Wonderful place, Paris. I went on a lark a few years ago and enjoyed myself completely.

Wonderful food, art everywhere even under bridges and street signs, a magical place.

Letting yourself enjoy all that your surrounding have to offer is a gift you give to yourself. Sure, while sitting at a street cafe, sipping Kir Royal and eating a chocolate crepe, you could assume Paris is a dream come true.

But what about your own homeland. Having traveled to some, uh 'interesting' places I can tell you no matter where you live someone else will be amazed at your surroundings. All my exchange students stand in awe of Meijers. To them it is a wonderland of fruits and vegetables all available in one place at any time of the day or night.

My friend Kim (hey Kim!!!) came from London and when we picked her up in our van she dang near fainted...then when we took her to McDonalds and she got a large order of fries all she could do was laugh in delight at the size.

A few of my friends have never seen snow. And while I can be happy in the idea that someday my future will not include snow brushes, rock salt, scrapers, ice melt, or snow boots... they were so excited at making a tiny snow man.

Once, one of my exchange student daughters had disappeared...we found her laying on the ground in the back yard, looking up in the sky, transfixed. When I asked what she was doing, she said she was looking at the stars...she had never really seen them because she lived in a big city and the lights and pollution blocked out the sky.

So, while I highly endorse going anywhere you possibly can, don't neglect your own environment. Looking at something with a brand new perspective may just give you a thrill...I will, however, never love snow.

A message from Sophie and Lily

We is really tired to waitin to go do sumptin till it gets warmer...wot does big lady expect...its winter, there is sno...

its not like she has to go out in icy weather with sno up to her boobies and look for the best place to pee

and its not like she has to stomp around in the woods wit sno past her sholders looking for the poop she so carefully placed

she even has stuff on her feet...tho once she had some slippers on and when I pulled real hard they came off...oh we laffed and laffed at that

and can we help it if we love to chase sno...and eat sno...and run around in sno...especially at night...

man she can make some interestin noises when its dark and her robe comes untied...

we lub winter we lub sno and ice and runnin so fast our front ends circle our back ends...we lub it all

i hope someday big lady can learn to lub it to

but i don tink so