glass heart

I think I must have a glass heart, it gets broken so easily. I take things so personal and find myself in the pits of depression for days...

I remember the first time this happened, I was 12 maybe...and learned they had canceled Dark Shadows. Lord, I took to my bed for a week.

Then later in life...the very sad and devastating news about Rely Tampons...they were the best!!! what's a little toxic shock got to do with it.

Then they stopped publishing my favorite magazine around 1978...anyone remember New Dawn??? that broke my heart and spirit. Never again would I believe in the power of subscriptions!

My heart seems to break for reasons that defy logic...someone dies, someone gets arrested, something falls into ruin...meh. But stop making chocolate bubble gum or close my favorite restaurant and I will cry for a week.

Loosing work hurts, being turned down for a job, that kills. It has gotten to the point I have stopped looking for work because my heart just can't take it. And I'm betting it's not in my best interest to write in the thank you letter I send for all interviews ...'oh, and don't forget if I don't get this job I will pout and whine and sulk for weeks...'

The last thing that broke my heart...watching the building of a local Dollar General knowing it will kill the mom and pop stores that are struggling to stay alive. That hurt. The fact that they tore down my favorite greasy spoon to build it only added to the pain.

So to all us tenderhearted people out there I say...tomorrow is another day, filled with chocolate and sunshine...sure, no more greasy burgers on home made grilled bread or cheesy tv shows that caused you to question your taste, but new and exciting thing that will be snatched from your hands when you least expect it.

Springtime in Michigan

Sorry for not writing, I have been sick for 2 weeks straight! Living in Michigan with psycho weather and in the middle of a home remodel project is not the time to come down with cooties. And determined little cooties they are!

But I have been productive, making countless of these girly necklaces that just don't seem to be my typical thing. And I am stocking up for my Mother's day tea at the Emerald Dragonfly. So I guess being sick kinda works.

What doesn't work is trying to function with this illness...laundry still needs to be done, we are completely out of food and are now eating Romain noodles left over from my Thai exchange student (thanks YOK! you may have just saved us) The dogs, while comforting and clingy, still insist to be fed and walked...I am sure my neighbors are confused as to why I am out in the yard, hacking up a lung in my housecoat at 4:00 in the afternoon.

I live on cough syrup and Tylenol, I try to keep hydrated and drink tea, but it just doesn't work for me...I need a gas station cappuccino and a cheese danish...I got warm caffeine free diet coke and a pop tart. *sigh*

The house is an absolute mess, with boxes of flooring material stacked in corners. All my worldly possessions are stuffed into bedrooms, closets, bathrooms and porches...like spring cleaning on crack! So of course, yesterday Sophie gets sick and spends 12 hours vomiting all over my new floors, old carpet in my office, bedroom and hallways...so now I gotta clean carpets.

I'd ask for a do-over, but it might just be worse. My friend Eva has the same symptoms and PINK EYE!!! Bless you Eva, I would have been found in the back seat of a squad car by now.

And now David has IT...whatever IT is...so we both sound like refugees from a tuberculous ward.

I think I will just go back to bed...

The queen needs a makeover

yup, its time...

Hair hanging straggly in face, lovely grey roots shining through the big-lots burgundy $2 hair dye...its time for an overhaul.

*Sigh*

I go through this every once in a while...the dreaded conversation with the stylist that will amount to me spending inordinate amounts of time searching for pictures hoping against hope that THIS time there will be a meeting of minds and I will come out looking like a person who realizes its not 1983.

Last time...swear to god, I went in and said...'look, just give me a 1976 throwback shag and get it over with'...yup, just THIS close to a mullet.

And, I am thinking of getting an entire new color...maybe even highlights. Last time I got highlights the lady gave me about 7 different colors ranging from bright blond to red..It sounded good, but on the super short hair cut she gave me it looked more polka-dotted. And with my moon face, super short looks more medicinal than modern.

And every stylist wants me to go super straight...trust me on this...moon face-super straight is not a good combination. I know its popular but that don't make it right on my saggy baggy face.

I would love to go in and say...'just make me look like I have a clue'...don't give me the latest 'thing' as I am 52 years old and don't really give a good healthy bran muffin what is current or trendy.

I was out the other day and saw a woman about my age with a way too young, way too trendy hair do, complete with funky colored bangs...dressed in a jacked up pair of over-alls and sporting some high tops...I am sure she thought she looked uber cool and young, but she just looked sad and pathetic. And she was trying wayyyyyyyy to hard to pull this look off...she didn't really 'own' the style, it 'owned' her.

So, given what I got to work with and having no hope whatsoever I will make the apointment and try to be one with my stylest. *sigh*

it's what I do...

hey everybully, its Lily and I got som tings to get offa my chest...
first, im a bulldog, and i tink i am bee-u-tiful...i don no wat fugly means but it cant be as bull-t-full as i am...

2...im jus a pup...sometimes i get excited and jump and chew and pee and other stuff...i am learning but it is boring and i would rather jump and chew...and pee

C: sorry about chewing off sophies collar 4 times last month...that sause you put on the last one made it taste like mexico. and the harness was too ugly anyway...nice try with the chain one.

also sorry about eating all the toys, but i should get sum credit for leaving the shoes alone ...by the way, this baseball mit is de-lish!

and i don no wat bully are suppose to do and wat they don usually do, so if i jump like a jack russle den oh well...i got lots of N.R.G. wat eber dat is.

so big lady just needs to we lax and enjoy de show

and som more treats would be nice 2

sin cerealy
lily

etsy overload

This necklace was made a while ago but I held it back (along with a bunch of other things) till I decided what to do about Etsy.

For those of you that don't know, Etsy is a site designed for the arts and crafts community to sell their wares. Lately my relationship with this company has seemed to take a dark turn. The seem to go out of their way to make bone headed moves and say outrageous things, they don't seem to care about the customers or their problems and dwell in the world of dark hipster doom.

Like a bad relationship, I keep hoping things will get better...
they promised they would get better...
they told me they would stop being so abusive...
and that whole 'privacy thing' was a one time thing and it will never happen again...

Sure there are other sites, but I have invested a lot of time and money to set my shop up there.
(the equivalent of 'staying for the sake of the kids')

And I could set up my own web site but am not a tecchy and have no computer skills whatsoever...
(how can I make it alone?)

And they are constantly working at becoming the best marketplace on the net.
(the promise to never do 'that' again)

So, till I finally decide, I will post some things on Etsy, review my options and maybe pull myself out of this abusive situation. Is there any chance Etsy will get over themselves??? If they sell out to people who can put it back on the track, instead of trying to integrate into 'social shopping' (their words, not mine).

This is the perfect example of money corrupting ideals. And it makes me sad.

The key to success

I've lost mine so if anyone has an extra set they can loan me, just let me know.

It use to be so simple...get up, get dressed, go to work, come home, and do assorted stuff in between. Now, its get up, look for work, pretend to do stuff and try not to think too hard about things.

So, you go with what you got and open an Etsy shop. And that keeps you busy and avoids the entire 'unemployed' stigma. Then tax time comes around and you find out you just broke even if you don't include any 'wages'. But, you do this cuz you love it and the money doesn't matter...till the views dry up and sales plummet and you didn't make enough this month to pay your Etsy bill. Suddenly you look longingly at the people handing out the carts at Wal-mart and think to yourself...'what was that college thing all about?'

And then someone writes you an email telling you how much they love the item you sent them and how grateful they are for you sending them an extra goodie along with the order and you are their favorite shop and suddenly you get recharged.

So the next day you get up and charge right back into it again.

And you think to yourself:
Success...I guess it's in how you define it.

My heart is in the right place

My mouth and brain, not so much.

So I get a warning from etsy to learn to play nice or we wont let you talk to the other cool kids, and I am thinking...I don't care. If you act like an asshat, I'm probably gonna call you an asshat. And, if I am acting like an asshat, I fully expect to be called out on it...of course, that will never happen, just sayin'.

And if the local news asks my opinion on the Govenor, well...

Or if I am minding my own business at the local ACO and you come in all wierd and smelly and hand me a tract I will also probably lay some 'truth' on you. (first tip: take a bath, second tip: take the very obivious doiley off your head and avoid big giant hair bows).

And if you ask my opinion and I nicely and with as mush tact as I can muster offer you some constructive critisim, please take it with grace. Calling me and my momma every name in the book isn't gonna earn you any brownie points. And yes, I still think trying to sell mason jars with cloth under the rim is country but not classy. Selling them for 10X what people can get them for anywhere on this planet is just stupid...and yes, I'm sorry you asked too.

So I guess I stand by my constant prayer...
Dear Lord,
please keep your arm around my shoulder and your hand across my mouth.
Amen, and Amen.