Friday, December 16, 2011

Christmas news letter...

I've always wanted to be the kind of person to enclose a new letter in my Christmas know the type...'little baby-boy is reading at a 3rd grade level and has mastered Mandarin Chinese, pretty good for a 3 month old' kinda crap. But mine would say the same thing every year. All is well, nothing going on...everyone is reasonably healthy and working.

So, here is my first ever Christmas news letter dedicated to all my loyal readers...all 3 of you.

Merry Christmas, and I hope this letter finds you healthy and happy. This year I really focused on my hand made jewelry and opened a 2nd shop on busy with creating new and wonderful things:

Translation: No, I still am not working, and as I live in this god forsaken state I can safely assume I will not be working in the near future unless Tractor Supply starts hiring people to hand out carts.

David is still working for the energy company...people just love their electricity, LOL. So when you look at your Christmas tree with is lovely blinking lights just remember that my hubby helped bring that joy to your family.

Translation: Hubs is still working the swing shift at that salt mine and will be working Christmas eve and Christmas day but it doesn't really matter as I didn't even put up a tree and we decided not to get each other any presents..Ho-freakin'Ho Ho Ho.

And the pets are being as playful as ever.

Translation: I'm 2 squirrel heads and a mouse face ahead of the vermin trying to gain access to the house.

And living out here in the woods at this time is so lovely, the snow and ice hanging from the branches creates such a wonderful feeling of Christmas.

Translation: That last ice storm brought down a shit-ton load of branches, knocking out the electricity for 2 days, freezing my pipes and leaving me with no other form of heat besides burning newspapers and magazines. The dogs proved a good source of residual heat. I could, however, go out and get a bucket full of snow and melt it to flush the toilet on occasion.

Its so peaceful out here, giving me a lot of time to enjoy my crafts, read and commune with nature.

Translation: every morning, up at the crack of noon, watch some Judge Judy and piddle around till I decide some time this week I should actually get dressed. Who the hell decided it was a good idea to put the mail box way the flock out at the road, now I gotta find some shoes so I can schlep out to the box to get my 97 credit card offers and a Christmas card from the gas company.

So, to all my friends and family, I wish you the warmest of Holiday cheer, a time of peace and fellowship and a new year of full of Happiness.

Translation: So, to all my friends and family, I wish you the warmest of Holiday cheer, a time of peace and fellowship and a new year of full of Happiness. Now bugger off!

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